Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

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vette66_00
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Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by vette66_00 »

Ok its not my brother smart car but it is this guys brothers smart car.
Here is the link buy my brother's smartcar

And here is what it says with the pics included...LOL
Good Brother on Craigslist wrote:

my brother is selling his smart car and you should buy it.

lets talk about it's blistering performance first. first the engine will get you from 0-60 sometime around 20-30 seconds so by the time you want to merge on the freeway from a tight onramp, you should only have to slow down traffic around 30-40 mph. next is the high performance, rapid shifting transmission--it shifts so slow and unsmooth that you'll be testing the firmness of your headrest while getting a full neck workout everytime you accelerate! this car only has 30xxx miles, but because of the engine's coarse nature (attributed to its 3 cylinder motor), it feels as if it may fall apart tomorrow.

next lets talk about this cars awesome fuel efficiency. not only does this car get 40+mpg, but it's extreme performance engine that accelerates the car to warp speed yet makes roughly the same power as a lawnmower requires 91 octane. enjoy the extra gas mileage, because you'll have to spend an extra $.20 a gallon at every fill up.

the chassis and suspension of this car are unparalleled--in no other modern car can you slam on the brakes hard enough to bottom out the front suspension. this gives the car superior feel and lack of control (especially while going over bumps), giving you that desirable white-knuckle nervous feeling while screaming to stop in life/death situations. the suspension also handles extra vehicle loads with gusto and awkwardness--we'll discuss this in a later section.

the superior aerodynamic design of the smart car contributes greatly to dramatically increased wind noise while in the cabin. also, the overall proportions and width to height ratio are such that when large vehicles, such as the honda civic or mini cooper, pass on freeways, the car feels as if it may topple over. semi-trucks and heavy crosswinds typically induce prayers or immense concentration on the drivers part in order to manage the erratic steering wheel as the car wanders across the road.

interior space is one of the fortes of the smart car. there is enough space in the passenger compartment for two massive people, and the engineers at smart paid special attention to the fact that the occupants of the car sometimes bring their possessions along with them from time to time. as a result, the smart car has a whopping backpack-sized trunk compartment that can stow all of your materials such as a tissue box or a binder. it is not recommended to pack cold lunches in this compartment as the motor is directly beneath and may heat up your contents (this may be a benefit to those who pack hot lunches).

smart engineers knocked out two birds with one stone when they decided that the smartcar should fit neatly into bike lanes. not only does the smartcar have the stability of a shopping cart, but the loss of normally desirable armrests and center consoles has caused a huge drop in sprung weight, reducing the smart's heft by 1 pound.

bringing us back to chassis and suspension dynamics, let it be noted that smart engineers also paid special attention to america's love of nascar while designing the smartcar. when the smartcar has only one occupant in the driver seat, the fine-tuned lack of stiffness in the suspension causes it to droop on the driver side of the car, further enhancing the cars ability to constantly turn left in circles for hours at a time.

the smartcar has the uncanny ability to fit in tight parking spaces (a huge problem in america, especially in costco parking lots). sticking with the small-sized theme, the smartcar's tiny tire diameter fits into potholes nicely and transmits all of the force through the overly-compressed suspension into the cabin and directly into the driver's seat while bouncing ridiculously out of the pothole--just as a shopping cart would if it hit a curb. every time you hit a pothole, the smartcar's advanced design won't forget to remind you.

just as you would dress up your cell phone or poodle, the smartcar's interchangeable plastic body panels allow you to mix and match to satisfy all of your rainbow driven desires.

this car will also come with a bike rack, which takes only an hour or so to mount to the car and prohibits access to the trunk. the bike rack also works well as a bumper extension, adding much needed material to the car in the case of a rear-ended collision.

the standard radio has been exchanged for an aftermarket touchscreen navigation unit and upgraded speakers that cost my brother probably a third the price of the car. it has bluetooth capabilities, which are VERY important for hands-free talking during insane steering instability from passing semi trucks or crosswinds.

price is $14650. definitely worth every penny. cheap commuter bike seen on the vehicle is NOT included.

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Re: Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by nacree »

LMAO :lol:

Now that is funny. I don't understand the SMART car either. An early 90s Civic VX or Geo Metro (with 3cyl) get comparable or better mileage and also have a trunk- and you don't look like a self-righteous prat while driving them.
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Re: Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by Bear45-70 »

My wife and I call those things "Death Traps." She had a guy hit by a truck from behind in one and he was crushed as the truck drove over the top of the thing.
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Re: Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by toboggan »

Bear45-70 wrote:My wife and I call those things "Death Traps." She had a guy hit by a truck from behind in one and he was crushed as the truck drove over the top of the thing.
hahahaha, im sorry, but i just have to laugh at that. haha
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Re: Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by fastplastic »

94 civic lx four door with room for two ppl and three kids all there crap in my pretty good size trunk and all the toys you can fit behind the seat got 43 mpg had enough power to almost get out of its own way and lx meaning fully loaded with power and still does less damage to the environment then a hybrid or electric car or any other so called green car crap p.s. honda crx hfs got 52 mpg from the factory better then that smart car
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Re: Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by patthesoundguy »

I agree smart cars arent smart! Buy a diesel VW jetta for the same price and fit 4 people and their luggage in it!!! ANd who wants to pay 14 to 16000 for a used go cart of a car!
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Re: Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by patthesoundguy »

I hear ya on the Honda they get that milage with ease with 300000 miles on them! and the three kids in it! lol
So many cars are a sham like the new Kia rio thing, it looks like it should get 45 miles to the gallon but only gets 30 hwy maybe. My 1986 chev celebrity 2.8 6 cyl with a carb gets more than that!!! And the toyoa hybrid thing runs for 4 miles I think before the engine has to kick in to make it work. MMM I like my spree more and more all the time I can get near 100 miles to the gallon. Near as I can figure 80km for 2 litres (2 litres is near half gallon) 80k is 50miles
so around 100miles to the gallon average. does that math make sense?
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Re: Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by wikked_spree57 »

This must be a total *. I was going down the freeway around christmas time doing around 80 and one of them little bastards passed me by like I was standing still. I was amazed.

Again, that guy also could have been in a s*** ton of danger. lol
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Re: Awesome Craigslist ad for "MY BROTHERS SMART CAR"

Post by Trafficjamz »

I worked on a '06 smart that was made by Mercedes benz

It was a chipped turbo charged .7 liter 3 cylinder with custom evil twin exhaust pipes.

It was pretty quick and went about 80 mph :surprise:

All smart cars are not created equal :wink:

The funny thing is, the 06 smart is not the smallest car we have had in the shop.
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